INTERESTS   

MY HOBBIES INCLUDE   

farting, killing, surfing, jamming, making people laugh (those people being me), fornicating, human hunting, black ops, flapping my arms and flying like a brick, gunslinging, llama baiting, watching chess--I mean CHESTS, predominately female ones, ordering my pizza with the crust on top, asking if I can keep the bags my groceries come in, spying on small third world nations, vigilantism, bungee jumping without the cord, skydiving without the plane, ferret wrestling, riding my polar bear, being a devout anti-anti-pornography activist, jousting, gluing toasters to shop windows.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU HAD 1 MILLION DOLLARS?

I'd buy 10 million more because that's how it works. I read a book.

NAME SOME QUALITIES YOU LOOK FOR IN THE OPPOSITE SEX

hotness and servility

WHAT ARE YOUR FUTURE GOALS?

always changing as I reach all my goals within minutes.

FAVOURITE QUOTE

All matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves.

FINAL WORDS

Yes. This: Most of you are fucking morons. Just because you have an unwarranted sense of self-importance, you spend forty hours a week on a sunbed (orangeskin), and you pretend you're bisexual doesn't make you anywhere NEAR as hot as most of you think you are. The illiteracy rate on here is truly abysmal and, if representative of the literacy rate of the entire US (as that's where most of you are from) then the world's in a fucking sorry state indeed. Now fuck off :)